Hiding in the Shadows

I'm more confused, baffled, freaked out and speachless then I can ever remember being...

So Mr ~~Perfect~~ Not-So-Perfect came round tonight before heading off to work. While I'm there cooking up some sweet and sour, he asks if he can ask me something (yes, I replied with the typical 'well you just have...'). He asked what were my two apologies for on Sunday - he knew one was for not spending the afternoon together, but was confused at the second.... So I said it was because I didn't reply to him. A look of confusion swept accross his face - reply to what? Well, I said, in the morning, when you said, y'know... Still the confusion remained.... When you said 'I love you' and I didn't reply... I never said that!.... He was adament that he never said it - wouldn't ever say it after a week....

Ok, so either one of two things have happened. Either he's right and never said it, and therefore I must've imagined it, lost my marbles completely and now portraying myself as some looney who hears voices....
Or he's back-tracking and trying to cover up the fact that he used the L word which wasn't reciprocated, and now has to create some bullshit to cover it up....

I don't like either scenario. I especially don't like the second one as it means that I have to finish with him, and fast. There is no way on this earth I'm getting stuck with another guy who thinks lying is a viable option and who makes me question my own mind. I mean, is is even possible I could have imagined it?! Why the hell would I! And why at that exact moment?! And why has it taken him two whole days to question the 2nd apology?! Something doesn't add up...

Unless I can find some scientific proof that shows I imagined it, or that maybe he said it and honestly can't remember, I've just achieved a new record for my shortest relationship....

Fuck. I really liked him too...

	This is my space to air my demons, where no-one knows my name. Here I sit, quietly, hiding from the world.
~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~*~

I hide beneath the black clouds of my broken soul, The soul that holds the love that is left, And the clouds that hold the life we could have lived. A twisted love runs deeper than the blood in my veins. But the past still exists, so please dont try to walk away. My broken soul is all you can see, and the black clouds will always be here. As I stare at my reflection through shattered glass, I take a look into our past. Will you ever realize how I feel? Our past can never be forgotton. Im still beneath the black clouds, Hiding from my misery. The love is still there, but the life has dissapeared. Do you understand what im trying to say to you now? If I told you I love you, I meant it with every breathe. If say I need you, I tell the truth. The black clouds are full of my pain, and my broken soul is all that I have left. So I will stare at my reflection through this shattered glass, and hide beneath the black clouds of my broken soul, The love still exists, and I wonder, What happened to the dream that we both could be living... ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~*~
* Characters *
	Mr Tall (Phill) Mr Persistant (Jason) Mr Not-Perfect (Ryan) Mr Short (Jon) Mr Identical (Daz)
* Previous Posts *
	That 'oh shit' moment A tall order -untitled- That dark place There goes another one... Running companies and running scared Stumbling in the dark Hopefully optimistic Ups and downs. And more Ups. Clearing up before the mess
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